Happy Hope'less'ness
It has been a tough week. Last week, almost every night I was out for one or another reason. I have found myself at Taksim at the end with different groups of friends and within different contexts. On the other hand, as some of you may already know; I always try to be a good householder. I pay attention to being tidy, clean and ready for having guests anytime. So, last week challenged me. I was busy at work. I had outdoors city activities and meanwhile I have runned home-related tasks.
None of them hit me as much a realizing that I am in love with another man after many years dedication to a single soul. (Selmin and Emrah definitely knows what I am talking about!!!)
I have already achieved to cut my soul-connection with him 2 years before. So that I am not even disturbed with his engagement news on the weekend. Se la vie...
The wall I hit this time is called with another name luckily... I know him already. I do not know him exactly. But it does not matter... To the guy I am in love, I have no rational access. Thus, that must be the reason that I am in love with him. I like puzzling things and conflicts. Once I slightly got close to start PhD on conflict-resolution. Anyway, I like conflicting issues. I do not like simple things unfortunately. One of the cleverest intellectual guys told me once that "Do u have to intellectualize anything you are interested ?" that's my problem.
I do not feel complete if I cannot deepen it.
Well, let me tell you the obstacles which make it impossible and unsolvable for me to be with him. He has a girlfriend that he loves. She is away and he is loyal. The end of the story is obvious. But I cannot stop myself being interested. Se la vie, Se la amour...
Hopeless situation in return which makes it more attractive then he is.
After all, the only good thing about the whole situation that I can feel it again for anyone else!
to be continued...
posted by naivegalaxy @ 12/28/2004 01:17:00 PM
3 Comments:
What I'm sure is this: you women are doubtlessly superior to men in creating the most complex circumstances to suffer in love affairs. ;-) What else can I say? Enjoy the feeling for the time being. Love is good to feel. Definitely... Yet dangerous as well. Would make me feel quite unsecure. Anyway... Every affair has its own story.
Mr. Dark Marcy
Human Loves Lawyer
(A Virgo)
;-)
Wow, I read this as good and bad news at the same time. It is sort of excting to know you're entering the new year in love, don't you think? (you guys know how i'm obsessed with new year's resolutions) So you'll be like a love bug the whole yea... Well well, let's not rush into things. Hums *wise men know, only fools rush in*. Am I in my goofy mood or what? In short, be careful my friend. Embrace love with one hand armed. And last but not the least, don't get drunk next to him ;-)
Selmin, our blogmaster, wisely shared her knowledge about how to give a link. Just visit my station and read her comment for "Poirot's song".
Link, Link, Link! Aile boyu serinlink!
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